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Since posting about sleep it seems like my children are testing my resolve to stick to my word about being sleep deprived. I'm not sure if that makes sense - I'm kinda tired. Anyways. The tiredness I feel today is nowhere near the tiredness I experienced when Gerry was a newborn. It's all relative.
I've noticed a lot of things about being tired though. When you're tired it's hard to keep perspective and it's hard to keep an optimistic attitude. It just feels like everything is hard and nothing is right. Life would be better if you were somewhere else, with different people, living in a different era, if you made better choices, etc. etc. Of course none of this is true. Even if I was in a different place, with different people, making better choices, if I was tired I would still be wishing for something else! I recognized today that this is just another way of not embracing the present. Of not being where I am right now. The biggest challenge to being present and accepting the moment is my own mind. If I can quiet my mind and just be then I can feel peaceful and even enjoy the moment while being tired. Time and again I've also seen how things tend to work out eventually. When you're tired you think that you are never going to feel rested again. Yet somehow it does happen. It's hard not to wish for other things when we aren't feeling our best. But wishing for something else only makes our situation feel worse. I'm still learning how to be tired gracefully. Lucky for me I'm sure I will have lots more practice. :-)
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Susan MayWife, mom, information and peace seeker. Categories
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November 2023
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