Welcome to the July 2014 Carnival of Natural Parenting: Family Vacation
This post was written for inclusion in the monthly Carnival of Natural Parenting hosted by Hobo Mama and Code Name: Mama. This month our participants have shared their family-travel tips, challenges, and delights. Please read to the end to find a list of links to the other carnival participants.
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If you go over to my other blog here: Everyday Adventures: Our Western Adventure you can see all of the amazing, beautiful, and fun things we did.
I also posted quite a few pictures during the trip on Facebook such as these:
7 nights, 3 hotels, 2 states, 2 long drives, 1 overwhelming amusement park, 1 awesome playground, 1 amazing children's museum, and 8 early mornings... we are ready for flight #2 to bring us home (in 7 hours! what to do?? Pack and repack and chillax in our room I guess!) Gerry seems finally to have adjusted to this traveling thing just in time to go home. Marisol has a full blown cold. I know that we posted lots of pretty pictures, but OF COURSE we had lots of less than pretty, "perfect" photo-ops this past week (many of them presented by our 4 year old life coach...) I can definitely say that all of the challenging moments (child who wants nothing to do with "The Happiest Place on Earth", child who cries for much of a 4 hour car ride that he just wants to go home - and not to fly, but to drive! - children waking to face the day at 4-5 am, making sure we had enough food to eat for early wake ups, all of us exhausted by 6 pm...) were worth it! We had fun together, learned together, grew together... vacations are like life amplified and shrunk down to a short stretch of time... our attitudes can make or break them. <3
Our challenges began before the vacation even started. Those of you that follow or are friends with me, may have caught some comments about Gerry not wearing shoes. For over a month before our vacation he would not put shoes on and would only wear shorts and t-shirts (even though we were in the midst of the coldest, snowiest winter we've had in Virginia in years.) In January the kids and I visited my parents in Florida for 10 days. He did not put his crocs on once - not on either flight, not when we went to a restaurant, not even when we went to Lego-land. Here is some photographic proof:

Gerry was also VERY into the Wii through the whole winter. He loves video games - especially any Mario game. When we went to Florida my mom had a Wii for their house so we brought all of our favorite games. This was mostly a good thing - the weather wasn't all that warm so it gave us something to do. But it was also a challenge getting Gerry to get out of the house. So we were concerned about how he was going to deal with a week long vacation away from the comforts of home (aka Wii!) that involved long plane and car rides.
When we got home from Florida we had about 3 weeks until we flew out to California. Every time we went to one of Marisol's classes or a friend's house Gerry cried that he never wanted to leave the house again. So I wrapped him up (usually in his favorite sheet - a blue, queen sized "lovey") and carried him to the car in the freezing cold. We had 3 weeks to "shoe train" - I really wanted him to be ok wearing shoes so he could enjoy Disneyland and go on rides! (I had managed to sneak him on a couple rides at Lego-land, but wasn't confident this would work in Disney.) Gerry really wanted (and still wants!) to get the Wii U game system which is about $300. We told him every time he wore his shoes we would put a tally on a sheet of paper and put a dollar towards our "Wii U account." (We only ended up doing a few tally marks, and we haven't bought a Wii U yet. It's something he still wants and we are considering for next winter.) Over the 3 weeks he put his shoes on for short stretches a handful of times. The longest was when we went into Target to get some candy for Valentine's day.
Incredibly, on the trip he wore shoes whenever he needed to - no fights or problems. Ironically though, he didn't want to go on any rides in Disney so my worrying was pretty much pointless!

Marisol and I really enjoyed our morning together alone at the park on the second day. It was actually a very relaxed way to "do" Disney! We could do whatever it was she wanted to do, and I was able to focus completely on her. It was like a "mommy/daughter" date. We arrived at the gates before they opened (they open an hour early for guests staying at the hotel) and went straight to Space mountain. We ate breakfast together, caught the show in the "Tiki room" and went to the petting zoo where she got to pose with Woody. My favorite ride with her was the bobsleds. It was just a great morning!
Basically we kept affirming for him that he wanted to go home and that he was sad/upset. And we stayed (relatively) calm (deep breathing is an important parenting strategy that is very helpful) while also letting him know that we weren't going home yet. The good news: once we got to Vegas and settled into a new hotel and doing fun things, he was totally fine. The highlights of Vegas included the aquarium at Mandalay Bay, a park with an awesome playground and a small mountain we hiked up (ok, hill - but mountain sounds way cooler), and the children's museum.
It can be really beneficial to plan and prepare for vacation - to pack well and be proactive and and talk about our plans with our kids. But it may be even more important to consciously Land ride it out - literally! ET GO of all the plans once you are actually in the midst of it: To be flexible and calm in the face of bad weather and meltdowns, to realize that as the parent, you are the adult and therefore should be the one who is mature enough to change your plan and regulate your emotions. It would have been easy to be really bummed that we spent a lot of dough on Disney and Gerry didn't really seem to enjoy or appreciate it (at least not in the way we had hoped he would! In reality he loved parts of it.) Instead we rolled with it and were able to have fun anyway. It would have been easy to let his cries really unravel us and get us down on that long (but beautiful) drive to Las Vegas, but instead we were able to stay calm (I want to be sure and add that I don't always feel calm on the inside. Sometimes I feel anxious and stressed and wish I was somewhere else. But I've learned that none of those things help and so I can often keep those things to myself while deep breathing. Sometimes Mike and I vent later to each other out of earshot of the kids. But sometime staying outwardly calm is the best we can do, and faking it is almost as good as for-real-internal calm. And even better - with practice it can turn into internal calm.)
It's at times like these that I'm exceptionally grateful for the principles that guide our family (peaceful/gentle parenting, unschooling - whatever term you wish to apply). I am also incredibly lucky to have Mike as my partner on this journey with our kiddos. I am always confident in our ability to have a good time together and to learn and grow together too. And that makes for many wonderful vacations.
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Visit Hobo Mama and Code Name: Mama to find out how you can participate in the next Carnival of Natural Parenting!
Please take time to read the submissions by the other carnival participants:
(This list will be updated by afternoon July 8 with all the carnival links.)
- Favorite Family Vacation Recipe: Staying at Home — The best family vacation Laurie Hollman at Parental Intelligence could ever recommend requires minimal packing, no hotels, unrushed travel, easy meals to everyone’s taste without a bill, no schedules, everyone’s favorite interests, and three generations playing together.
- Scared of toilets and other travel stories — Tat at Mum in search is an expert at flying with kids. She shares some of her tips and travel stories.
- Staycation Retreat for Busy Mamas — Lydia's Handmade Life gives Budget-friendly, eco-friendly staycation ideas for busy work-at-home moms.
- How We Leave It All Behind — At Life Breath Present, they don't take traditional vacations — they go on forest adventures. Here are some tips in planning for an adventure, if you don't just go spontaneously, as they have before. Plus, many pictures of their latest adventure!
- Traveling while pregnant: When to go & how to manage — Lauren at Hobo Mama discusses the pros and cons of traveling during the different trimesters of pregnancy, and how to make it as comfortable as possible.
- Our Week in Rome: Inspiration and Craft Ideas for Parents, Teachers, and Caregivers — If anyone in your family is interested in learning about Ancient Rome, if you enjoy crafts, of if you're a parent looking for a fun staycation idea, check out Erin Yuki's post for a Roman-themed week of crafts, food, and fun at And Now, for Something Completely Different.
- The Real Deal: A behind the scenes look at our "Western Adventure" — Often Facebook and blog posts make vacations look "picture perfect" to outsiders. If you only looked at the pictures, Susan's recent family vacation was no exception. In this post at Together Walking, she takes readers "behind the scenes" so they can see the normal challenges they faced and how they managed to enjoy their vacation in spite of them.
- Welcome to the Beach House! — Kellie at Our Mindful Life is in love with her family's new "beach house"!
- Road Trip to Niagara Falls — Erica at ChildOrganics writes about her first trip out of the country with just her and the kids.
- 5 Essential Things to Take on Vacation — Five things Nurtured Mamas should be packing in their suitcase for their next trip, in a guest post at Natural Parents Network.
- The Many Benefits of Camping with Friends — Do you want to go camping, but the very thought of it seems daunting? Make your life easier - and your kids happier - and go camping with friends! Dionna at Code Name: Mama discusses how much better camping can be when you join forces with others.
- My Natural First Aid Kit for Camping, Travel, and Everyday Use — Jennifer at Hybrid Rasta Mama gives us an insiders looks at her natural first aid kit for camping, travel, and everyday use. These natural remedies have saved her hide and those of others many times! You might be surprised what made her list of must-haves!
- Traveling Solo and Outnumbered — Alisha at Cinnamon and Sassafras shares lessons learned from a recent trip with two toddlers and no co-parent.
- Compromise and conviction on the road — Jessica of Crunchy-Chewy Mama shares the reality vs. the dream of travel and dishes on the compromises she makes or won't make while traveling.
- Camping Trauma — Jorje of Momma Jorje offers why she loves camping and why she and her family are a little gun shy about it, too.
- First in our Books — Writing fresh from her first family vacation, Laura from Pug in the Kitchen has realized that helping pack her parents' station wagon made for a smooth and pleasant trip that was more than she hoped for!