That's a lotta "Ps"! I love it! (I know, I'm a dork - but I've learned to embrace my dorkiness, I can't help it if I love alliteration!)
I've been thinking about perfection and the pressure to be perfect (more "Ps"!) a lot the past few years. It's one reason I love Mayim Bialik's book so much (the one I'm giving away this week!) - she does not paint a picture of perfection (haha, I'm not even doing it on Purpose anymore!) in her life or family, in fact she admits that they are anything BUT perfect.
I stumbled across a post this week about how photographs posted online can give others the impression that a person is leading an idyllic or "perfect" life. If we were being rational we would know that of course NO ONE'S life is perfect and everyone struggles sometimes. Just because beautiful pictures are posted publicly, that doesn't mean that there aren't less-than-perfect moments in the person's life.
This is the reason that I posted my "Ultimate Confession" right at the top of my website - I don't want anyone ever thinking that *my* life is perfect or that we never mess up here. I don't want to contribute to competitiveness, guilt, jealousy or other destructive feelings in the world. I was thinking about this last night and then the irony struck me hard - I chose to use beautiful, professional photos at the top of my "confession" page! Ha! What a juxtaposition - my confession of how we are human with real flaws, coupled with the happy, "picture-perfect" moments captured of my family (next to a cornfield at that!) ... wow. Kind of a huge visual/literary oxymoron. But my point in choosing those pictures is that even though our lives don't always look like a professional photo, I do *choose* to focus on the good times and happy moments.
Of course we share the happy, sunny, smiling, moments on Facebook. We put pictures on our blogs of cute kids holding hands or hugging each other tightly. We instagram kids throwing leaves into the air and running freely with wild abandon. I hope that pictures of shiny, wide-eyed children and beautiful walks next to sunset streaked oceans are inspiring to others - I know they are for me.
I have a few pictures of Marisol crying miserably when she was a baby. I don't think I have one of Gerry. Does that mean he cried less? (well... maybe! haha) More likely, it reflects a change in myself as a parent. I don't even think of grabbing the camera when he is in a state like that anymore. My first thought is to comfort, offer my arms and presence - not to pick up the camera!
Remember, what you see online are snapshots. It doesn't mean anyone is "lying" or trying to deceive their audience - it simply means that they are choosing what they present to the world. No one, no family, no life is "perfect". But it is true that some people are happier then others. Why? Because they know that true Peace and Happiness comes from within and is of their own making and choosing - no matter what imperfect circumstances arise in their life.
Synchronicity - after having drafted this blogpost a few days ago I read this post from Glennon over at Momastery. I guess these things are on people's minds.
Also, when I started this post and as I posted my latest give-away I had no idea that Mayim Bialik had filed for divorce. Mike brought it to my attention last night and it I definitely have a lot of feelings and thoughts about that. Mostly compassion for her and her husband and kids as they go through a tough time. Mayim has really put herself and her beliefs about attachment parenting "out there" and now she is under even greater scrutiny - of course people are questioning if their style of parenting contributed to their split.
I will just say that the book is awesome, regardless of her marital status, I promise! Head over to this post and leave me a comment if you want to enter the drawing!
Wife, mom, information and peace seeker.